সদুপদেশ গ্রহন করার জন্য অন্তরে আগ্রহ সৃষ্টি না হওয়া এবং নিজের অভিমত খণ্ডিত হতে দেখেই অন্তরে ক্রোধের সৃষ্টি হওয়ার নামই অহংকার। আত্মপ্রশস্তি ও অহংকার মানুষকে নিম্নস্তরে নিয়ে যায়।

— ইমাম গাজ্জালি (রহঃ)

First love never be forget

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Love is divine we all know that . We all fall in love with some one. When we fall in love we actually don’t explain what the situation is going on. Love is called actually a feeling which we feel for someone.
The time was happened before my marriage. One evening time ,I spend my time in my university campus with some friends. I still remember I hear a guitar tune. I like guitar tune very much. Someone plays the guitar song with his friends. I carefully see that he is very handsome , smart, manly and open hearted.
I feel like paradise, I can’t explain actually. One of my friend says actually when you feel love, you find in every where the fragrance of rose. I feel crush with the boy who plays guitar . I ask my friends who is he. They all say they know him .He is our cricket team captain. He is also our debate campaign. I hear carefully about him .I feel he is a kind of gift for me who is send by Allah. But I think all time the person gives me no knock . what can I do ? I think all the time about him. I feel if I don’t find him, I don’t find anything in life. One day he comes in my class and searching me .I feel very shy .I also think ,why he search me? I don’t know. I say him yes, tell me how can I help you. He requests me and says, please give me some time after your class. I feel excited. He says me that please give me 1203 course final suggestion , it’s my retake .He talks with me one half an hour . I say him please you can join our 1203 course classes for your final term . He join as I say . He all time sits beside me. He also becomes my friend. We all time spend our break time together. Later I realize that I fall in love with him .
I am Aparna Chowdhury. The person whom I love name Manas Chowdhury. Later , one day I talk in phone with him my father hears my talk everything. He tells me, “who is the boy with whom I talk.” I afraid to see my father’s face. His action is very violence with me. He thinks that Manas is not good guy and he is not perfect for me. But I can’t understand why he doesn’t like Manas . What is lacking attitude in Manas? I feel very upset. One day my father tells me that he arranges my marriage. I feel very upset and cry so much. My mother says me “ she can do nothing for me” . I want to ready to elope with Manas. But later I remember that I am one of the elder daughter of my parents. I have two sisters more .what can I do? I wish if my sisters already married I can leave my house. If I go , everyone insult my parents and also say, “you can’t manage your daughter. Your daughter is very selfish”.
I want to drink poison and I want to attempt suicide. I think later it’s also not right for me to attempt suicide. I feel very hurt what I do ? I can’t do anything for my love. My father loves me so much. What I want ,he all time try to give me. He tries to feel my all wishes. My mother also loves me so much. She all time supports me in every kinds of step. My parents give me freedom . They all time think about me and my sisters’ future. My parents start to quarrel all the time. My mother cries all the time. I don’t want to see for me my parents quarrel all the time.
I tell everything Manas. He tells me ,”if I have a job and I become a successful businessman I will go to your house and give them proposal to get marry you. He cries, I can feel that. He tells me, let’s leave our house and l can’t live with you. I tell him please , think practically. Never take any negative step without think . If we leave our parents we never be happy. I love you also. I never forget you.
I come home back after meet him. I cry so much . He again call me and say me “if I am not find you , I will death”. I tell him ,Don’t be crazy. We are adult now. He calls my mother , my mother tells him that she can’t do anything for us . Because My father was very angry man.
I love my father very much .I can’t leave my family for Manas. Because My parents gives me nice world. They love me. Actually my father thinks that Manas is not established person and he haven’t any job. We have only one year age difference. So my father doesn’t agree with my and Manas’s marriage.
My own philosophy is that all time career creates very big problems between two lovers. Our parents do many things for our sake. They sacrifice their happiness many times for us. We also have to do something for them.
Later ,I agree with my parents for my marriage. And now I am married .And I love my husband now. In the beginning time I avoid all the time my husband. But later I think that my husband has no fault .He loves me so much. So I start to love him. But I never forget Manas because he is my first love. First love is called first feeling and it can’t be forget.

Writer: Chowdhury Anni 

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